Smile And Wave

Life Lately

Hello, blog! I've been thinking a lot over the last few months about what I want this space to be and the role it should play in my business and life. With Brett in grad school on the GI Bill, our roles have shifted from him being the full time breadwinner and me working for the pleasure of it when I have time to me needing to work as well. I'd call my work part time but between his schooling and sharing parenting and household responsibilities, we're both working every day of the week and filling in the gaps for each other when one of us has a deadline. It's intense and not without daily challenges of finding any sort of rhythm but it's also been kind of great. I'm not going to lie, there are days when I dream of having a weekend off (or even a full day off every week) but I also know our hard work is only for a season and that the benefits will serve us greatly down the road. 

With so many work hours on creative projects being outsourced to paying gigs or creating weavings to send out into the world, there has been much less time for sharing DIY's just for this space or even documenting as much of life as I used to. The big kids are in school most of the day and my days with Smith are mostly spent at home and tightly scheduled around work hours and errands so I've found it challenging to have a lot of content to share other than family celebrations. Life is full! I miss the slower pace of things a lot of days but I also feel so proud of myself for all of the ways I've risen to the challenge.

That said, this space is still so special and important to me. I'm eager to continue to find ways to tend to the things that are fulfilling even when the list of duties is long. Way back in the day when Sebastian was the only kid on the scene and I spent my days running a scrapbook kit subscription (anyone remember Red Velvet Kit Club?) it was a trend to document things in lists. I know a few other moms that do this on their own blogs and it's the perfect way to share when you've only got twenty minutes to spare. I also plan on doing this when it makes sense and not every week because now is not the time for biting off more than I can chew. If you're not already doing this in your own space, feel free to join in sharing your own Life Lately lists. I think it's a great way to stop and check in with ourselves every now and then. 

Learning

-how to set business goals each month

-how important it is to get outside every day

-to speak up and ask for what I want

-to show my kids how to gracefully stand up for yourself when slighted by someone

-to let the excuses go and make changes where I can

-to accept that I can't do everything at 100% right now and be okay with that

 

Getting Better 

-overcoming anxieties that want to keep me from taking action for fear of failure

-owning the fantastic opportunities that have come along lately

-finding ways to finish things in small chunks of time

-resisting the urge to splurge

 

Celebrating

-reaching business goals three months in a row 

-the chance to work from home and provide for my family

-pre-orders for my book on the horizon

-our yard getting green again

-Smith finally sleeping all night long in his own crib (THIS IS BIG, FRIENDS!)

 

Needing

-more time carved out for friends

-more fun

-ice cream (don't judge) 

I think I could technically knock all three of the last column out at once if I schedule a lady date over ice cream. Springfield friends...it's on my list! 

I'm off to the airport to pick up my handsome grad student that's learning all about sustainable business practices and then it's an afternoon full of weaving for me. I'm THIS CLOSE to opening up my Etsy shop to offer the wall hangings I've got left over from my flash sale on Instagram (@smileandwaveflashsale) and then I've got two more big DIY's I'm working on while Brett is officially on spring break. It's sunny outside today which means this Monday is already looking promising!

Thanks for reading, friends. 

-Rachel

Right Now

August is the month of hustle at our house. I have a dream project in the works, the big kids are returning to school, Brett is starting grad school and will be commuting to San Francisco one week a month while working part time here, and all of our routines and schedules are shifting again. It's all exciting and welcome and I'm so thankful for the things that have been lining up as we've needed them to.

It's a little insane, at the same time. My dad once told me the busier you get, the more efficient you become. It's always been true for me as I tend to work better when a fire is lit under my toosh! This summer has been full of eCourse writing, projects for A Beautiful Mess, personal projects such as launching Smile and Wave prints, and sharing all of the chores and responsibilities that comes with running a house and raising three kids. As you can imagine, we're not keeping all the plates spinning without one or two falling off and needing put in the dishwasher because our floors need mopped. 

I'm continuing to give each day the best that I have and making peace that it's not always going to match up with the high expectations I sometimes place upon myself as a human being, wife, mother, friend, etc. We're throwing grace around like candy and being supportive and forgiving as we settle into our new routines, roles, and schedules.

I'm learning that if I'm not happy with something, I've got to do what I can to change it. There's no good that's going to come from sitting down and pouting. Get up and find a way to make it better for yourself. Keep on finding a way if your first attempt, second attempt, third attempt miss the mark. Get someone in your corner to help you get back up when you're tired of trying. 

I hope your week is colorful with at least one little thrill embedded in there somewhere. You deserve it!

-Rachel

Goals for 2015 - Better Late Than Never

I stopped writing down New Year's resolutions in college because I'm pretty resistant to change. However, I'm relearning how positive goal setting can be, whether I reach my goals or not. It's about a fresh perspective and a new intention. 

My goals this year aren't as specific as lose twenty pounds (yes, that'd be nice) or remember to send cards on every friend's birthday (I forget to take out recycling every other week) as they are areas in my life that would benefit me and my loved ones if I focused on them more. 

Gratitude: Switching out my longing for what I don't have with thankfulness with what I do.

Vulnerability: Finding that soft place to land within those friendships that are meant for it rather than pulling away when things get hard. Who is to say they aren't also moving through something hard and need me, too?

Communication: Being more intentional in responding to texts, committing to social engagements, inviting people over for casual get togethers, letting people know where things stand instead of waiting until it's all ready to share, not assuming people know things and actually talking about them. Why this is so hard for me, I'm not sure. 

Paying Attention: I tell Sebastian and Ruby over and over to pay attention to what they are doing to help them avoid accidents, spills, injuries but so often my focus is split, too. Always working on setting aside my mental to do lists and fully listening and engaging with them. 

I could easily keep finding things I'd like to change or improve upon and I am all for continually trying to improve one's self but I feel strongly that these four things will be plenty for now. 

Have you been working on any goals for 2015? 

-Rachel

Photo Credit: Sarah Rhodes of Arrow and Apple.

Looking Ahead

Brett and I managed to sit down and have a planning meeting on the couch to help us map out what the next month of change will look like. We're moving back to Springfield, MO very soon as this chapter of life with the Army comes to a close and another chapter begins to unfold. It's been such a long way off until this week and suddenly it feels like the days are speeding past me and the lists of things to finish before we leave only grow. 

Despite feeling overwhelmed I'm hoping we can enjoy this transition as we venture back to familiar territory and to friends that are as excited for our return as we are. We'll be settling in right before the holidays start needing our extra special attention and will be celebrating a certain five-year-old (once in both towns).

Today we finally found a rental that we're really excited about, thanks in part to Elsie and Jeremy, who took a tour for us and sent us photos and notes on more than one occasion. It's a Victorian within walking distance to downtown and has almost everything I was hoping for to keep us cozy until we find a home to make our own. More about that soon but not before I call my mom and fill her in first.

In the meantime I'm going to take a cue from Ruby and have a little fun with things as we enjoy our friends and favorite places in Colorado Springs one last time. We are taking with us so many lessons and memories in the time we've spent 6,000 ft in the sky. 

-Rachel

July, You Were a Good One

Remember that time last summer that my blogging became sporadic and then I told everyone I was pregnant? Yeah, that was rough. This summer it's just been full of life with three kids, contributor posts for A Beautiful Mess, e-course prep, our California vacation, a dog needing minor surgery and constant supervision, and the glass of orange juice that killed our lap top. I have blinked and school is almost upon us again! 

I was walking around Disney developing a post in my head about traveling with kids that I've forgotten most of my tips about and have wanted to share more about Smith's birth story lately and reflect on how challenging the last part of last year was for our family. So many blog post ideas and so little time to get them into this space. Sometimes it makes me sad that I can't offer more time to this blog because I know that even though it's a public place and I write to share things with an audience in mind, so much of this is just for me. The process of making things, the weekend stories about where we went, the photos of our messy house one week and a room tour the next-it's all so I can remember how this worked five or ten years from now. 

Sometimes I ache to record it all and then other times I wonder what I'm so worried about forgetting. The details, I suppose. This can't be the Truman Show but if there was someone following us around three times a week filming us and turning out highlight reels (with some lowlights included for good measure), I think I'd be on board with that. As long as that person didn't comment on how many days I go between washing my hair and they'd need to work for coffee and diy projects because that's what my cup is overflowing with these days.

I think this may be me coming out of a season of tiredness and privacy and into a season of connection again. Last year left me without much left to give after tending to the important stuff but I'm figuring it out again and the fog is thinning. It's still here but I can see a bit further on each month! It feels good. 

With that, I'm promising nothing but hoping for something to show up that has been a bit absent. Words with humor and heart instead of just instructions, peeks into our space even when it's out of sorts and without feeling the need to justify our messes. We're messy people and I feel bad about it a lot. I'm working on being less messy while also acknowledging the struggle is real. An update to the design of this space as it's long over due. I've been reading through Promise and Elise's Blog Design Love 2.0 class and am hoping to make those changes myself in the following months. 

We're also less than three months away from some big life changes. We'll be finished with the Army and moving back to Springfield, Lord willing and the creek don't rise. Big unknowns and big hopes are ahead and with that brings all the feelings. We're going to miss our friends here that have helped our time here feel a little less challenging on those most challenging days. We're also going to miss the huge mountain that takes up half of the windshield view when I'm driving downtown. A new chapter. Also, trying to stay present whilst we transition.

I'm hoping to share most of that in the appropriate ways in this space and thank you for stopping by every now and then to share in our lives. This space and this medium are so valuable to me.

-Rachel

Letting Go of the Excess

The last two or three weekends have been spent clearing out excess over here. I am pretty sure we can chalk it up to the nesting hormones because I'm usually not one to deep clean the whole place all at once. Brett and I are thankfully on the same wave length at the same time and are helping each other declutter hot spots, sort through our closets and get realistic about what we wear and how often, donate things I've been holding on to for years thinking I might get around to selling them again, and generally making our house feel more peaceful and much less cluttered as we prepare for a new family member to join us.

We've been in this home for two years this month and will be here for one more before Brett's time at Ft. Carson is up. Something about having the Christmas decorations up and feeling the long lasting effects of being too tired to keep up with the kind of housework that's necessary to not feel overtaken with toys and dirty laundry had me so unhappy with our space. I was talking myself down from the ledge of looking at other rental properties in town on a daily basis knowing the last thing we needed was to try and move on our own dime right before this baby was born. It was that bad, though, folks.

Finally, things just clicked and the overwhelmed feelings shifted to accepting I needed to start bagging stuff up and passing it along. It's been freeing and our home is feeling better and better each weekend. There is still more work to be done and possibly a visit from the Got Junk guys to haul off the two vintage couches that are too worn out for me to even feel good about setting out on the curb but we're making progress and I can feel myself enjoying our space again. Phew!

-Rachel

P.S. If anyone in Co Springs needs a vintage sheet fix, I dropped off three large trash bags at the ARC on Uintah on Friday. I bet they start hitting the floors soon.

On Staying Home and Liking It

Brett and I have put ourselves on a spending fast for the month of January. We've done so with hopes that we'll be able to see how much less we are capable of living on and that we'll be able to make some changes for the rest of the year. It's been a little over two weeks but one of the effects of not spending money on things we don't really need has been spending a lot more time at home.

Spending a lot of time at home is nothing new to me since I'm a work-at-home mama but I usually chomp at the bit to get out of the house and do something almost every day. I am a home body by nature but I also get cabin fever pretty bad. A walking contradiction, I know.

If I don't have a project underway for another blog or my own I find myself growing restless. Give me the choice of staying at home to clean or getting out of the house and I'm already pulling out of the driveway. I'm either headed to the thrift store, the nearest drive-thru coffee window, or the park. I've always got a sidekick and she enjoys going almost anywhere with me so there's little resistance to my plans when it's just the two of us but the effects of those habits are seen in our bank account and in the pile of laundry that's been sitting on our couch waiting to be folded.

You see, I hate doing laundry. I have had a giant pile of clean laundry on one of our couches for two weeks. We've just been getting dressed in the living room. Granted I was sick the whole first week but then I avoided it the second with the excuse that I had to get the Christmas stuff down first. Doing dishes is second on my list of things I don't enjoy and then there's cleaning the tub and mopping the floors. However, with limited options this month of how to spend my morning time because of our spending fast and the single-digit weather, I've found myself being forced to make better choices. 

I've been at the gym every day this week and then showered and dressed and tackling one small task at a time. There's still regular breaks to paint with Ruby, make a snack, or wipe a bottom but our house is more tidy than usual right now. We're not allowing ourselves to eat out or order in (except for that gift card to Poor Richard's pizza) so I've cooked healthful meals each night I've not been sick and Brett's been taking leftovers or store bought meals to work for lunch. What I've most enjoyed though is how removing the option to go spend money has given me the chance to remember that I can enjoy being at home all day every day. My focus has shifted and something has settled a bit inside. 

Holly wrote a post awhile back that I know resonated with a lot of women about slowing down, changing perspectives, embracing her responsibilities with joy, and living a more simple life. It was encouraging to hear she was finding what she needed and letting go of the things that were getting in the way and challenged me to think about whether I was brave enough to examine my own life and take similar steps. I'm not writing off thrift stores and coffee drive-ins over here but I am taking a break from old habits in order to make room for new ones. Healthier ones. 

I'm planning a post or two to share more about our decision to go on a spending fast, what it's looked like for our family, and what other changes we've seen as we move through the month of January. Brett and I are going to sit down at the end of the month and talk about how it's benefited us, see how much we've saved, and what options we want to give ourselves for doing it in the future. If you're curious and want to find out more about what a spending fast is you can read up on this blog. 

Have you ever battled restlessness at home yourself? What kinds of things have helped you feel like you're content where you are? 

-Rachel

P.S. I feel like I've left out the role social media can play in diverting restlessness at home (or being too much of a distraction altogether) and how isolation and loneliness can also play a part in wanting to get out of the house. We do also take advantage of free things in town like the park, the library, play dates at friend's houses, etc. These are all topics I'm interested in talking about in the coming weeks. Topics, yay!